In the Valley...

You probably made a choice to be happy this year no matter what,especially if a stream of tears on your cheeks characterized the past years,you woke up to 2013 with a resounding positive affirmation,things have to change! To achieve this,you have gone ahead and embodied the many philosophies that have been defined as the secrets to a happy living and yes you think positively before you leave your house in the morning,blessing the day ahead,counting your many blessings even if it's hard to remember them and walking with a thankful heart. After all you have been told these are great recipes to make a bright day for you. But alas,the insecurities find a way to creep in as weeks progress,yes you have been wishing to live past these insecurities and believe all you need is to choose to be happy,but how long can you hide what is behind that smile? You convince yourself all is well,but you know deep well if you apply logic into your current situation,a lot of your expectations will not sum up. Instinctively you choose to ignore,the voice in your head reminds you about that choice to be happy,not to shed a tear again. A look into your tweets which you have religiously followed all positive inspirational tweets tells you "Nothing is impossible... When we do not see our strength and we do not want to deal with something, we call it impossible."....then you wonder,where do I draw the strength from? How did the likes of  my hero Nelson Mandela stayed strong despite the long imprisonment he was serving? How do people  really walk in the deep dark valleys?

I have been in this valley it is tough,and yes I have been making progress to climb up and out...I know there is a struggle,a strong willed required and a no giving up resolve. Sometimes it feels like I am making  1 step ahead and 2 steps back. Sometimes I illuminate with sunshine because as deep down I might be,I look up and see  a beacon  light of hope peeping in through the valley,and my heart tells me it's just a matter of time and you will bask in that sunshine as well.Sometimes I look just around me in the valley and I can spot a sprouting green plant,a shade and even a stream running across..it's not totally dry,and there is life! But while I am here,I want to remember the light always,I want to hope above everything else that God has a bigger better plan for me, I am not going to walk in the valley for far too long,that He will strengthen me and lift  me high,that  my sunshine is just around the corner. And while at it,I am allowed to cry,when I feel the burden is too heavy,when strength fails me,when things are too difficult to even comprehend but Lord let me not forget that you are holding my hand and that I am your child. Let me also not forget how much you have been there for me,counting my blessings one by one. Let me always remember the simple joys that have kept me smiling all along,let me remember that I do have shelter,food,and an awesome family. Let me remember the wonderful gift you blessed me with in 2012. Let me always remember your unconditional love Lord,because when all things are said and done you are the Most Holy God,ever faithful and true.

Thank you  Lord for my beautiful baby Shani. One year has passed since she came into my life,and the pains of labor are nothing compared to the blessing she is in my life... She has taught me how to smile again,how to live again and great lessons that I can only owe them to my baby. Everyday I look forward to spend quality time with you dear;just to hear you call me mama,to watch you improve on your  steps and see what new thing you have learned. May true joy always be your portion my dear child. You are blessed and loved  so so much. Wishing you many more fulfilling years ahead! May you grow up to be a great fearless influencer for the Kingdom!

P.S:My God, teach me that every trial has a lesson and a gift in disguise, waiting only to be revealed in due time.

Be blessed.